criticass

CRÍTICA

Como você reage às críticas? Ouve para checar se faz sentido ou logo fica irritado e nem presta atenção?

E como você faz uma crítica? Tem cuidado ao falar? Espera o melhor momento para isso?

  Esse é o tema do artigo de hoje.

Uma crítica saudável deve ser construída com sabedoria, calma e de forma amorosa. Dever ser fundamentada em argumentos racionais, isenta do fogo das emoções. Deve brotar do desejo genuíno de fazer bem ao outro. O inverso faz parte da crítica nociva.

Ao fazer uma crítica considere os seguintes pontos:

– Crítica não é envenenar o mundo, diminuir o outro;

– Quando estiver tomado pela emoção não faça crítica, procure ficar só, calar-se até se acalmar. Palavras ditas não voltam mais;

– Uma coisa é ter o desejo genuíno de ajudar alguém, ter consciência de algo que o outro não parece perceber. Outra é ter o desejo secreto e camuflado de expor o outro ou fazer com que se sinta mal;

– A crítica nociva vem envolta de um prazer de provar a superioridade ao apontar o erro alheio.

Ninguém gosta ser criticado, mas é inevitável. Em casa, com os amigos, no trabalho, uma hora acontece. Você sabia que há formas de receber críticas que podem deixar esses momentos mais leves? Pois é. Só depende de você! Veja e reflita: 

 

 1º. Momento: Quando você for criticado apenas ouça. Imagine que você esteja ouvindo algo que seja sobre outra pessoa. Acompanhe o raciocínio, monte uma história em sua mente sem se envolver emocionalmente.

A negação ou a justificativa quase sempre vem automaticamente porque o ego está cumprindo o papel de defesa. É natural que venha a vontade de reagir defensivamente. Contenha-se! Apenas ouça o que o outro tem a dizer.

2º. Momento: Com a história construída em sua mente, perceba se faz algum sentido comparando com as suas atitudes e intenções. Cheque os pensamentos e comportamentos envolvidos na questão.

Lembre-se de que você tem poder de escolha. Pode escolher o que fazer com as informações. Não é a verdade absoluta.

3º. Momento: Tente compreender como a pessoa formou aquele conceito de você. Aí está uma grande oportunidade de conhecer as mensagens que você passa aos outros. Você poderá checar o quanto é claro ao expressar suas intenções. Ou se usa meias palavras, permitindo que o outro interprete seus pensamentos e sentimentos de forma diferente do que você esperava. 

 

Essa é uma grande oportunidade de autoconhecimento. Dê um tempo para compreender o que foi dito. Para isso acalme as defesas, tranquilize-se e reafirme a si mesmo que essa é a ideia de outra pessoa. Ela desconhece suas reais intenções. Afaste-se da reação emocional já automatizada em você. Isso só te levará a rebater e negar o que foi dito.

Experimente ter uma atitude diferente, você merece essa chance. Quando estiver mais calmo e menos emocional racionalmente avalie o que você ouviu.

-Existe alguma verdade naquilo?

-Existe algo que você possa aprender com essas colocações?

 

Seja honesto consigo mesmo. Ao chegar à conclusão de que aquilo não se aplica a você, que tal desconsiderar? Afinal, o que você ganha reagindo e se alterando se o que foi dito não cabe a você? Algumas pessoas enxergam no outro algo que gostaria de ter, ou joga sobre o outro o que sente em relação a si. É mais ou menos como se fizesse uma entrega ao destinatário errado.

Nesse caso, o melhor é apenas devolver a encomenda, sem alteração ou agressão. Às vezes o silêncio é mais precioso.

Por outro lado, preste atenção. Uma reação exagerada de sua parte a uma crítica que acredita ser infundada pode ser sinal de que não é bem assim. Pense comigo: Se uma crítica não tem nada a ver com você, por que te incomodou tanto?

Caso exista algo para aprender, se aposse desses aprendizados. Compreenda que todos, sem exceção, cometem falhas. A partir daí,fica reconfortante saber que numa próxima oportunidade haverá a possibilidade de se sair melhor.

Aja com maturidade e serenidade, deixe de lado a reação impulsiva. Ao reconhecer o lado positivo de tudo isso, agradeça a oportunidade e cresça!

Essa atitude é de fikagrande!

Pense nisso!

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Káthia Regina

Káthia Regina é pós graduada em Psicoterapia Breve, Cognitiva Comportamental e Psicossomática. Mestre em Psicologia da Saúde, Doutora em Neurociência e Especialista em EMDR (Traumas). Possui trabalhos desenvolvidos em ambulatório FMUSP e FMABC. Adora a profissão, dá ênfase ao bem-estar, satisfação e qualidade de vida. Seu objetivo é complementar e ampliar o potencial humano em sua concepção de ser, mente e corpo. Email: kathia4fitclub@gmail.com Instagram: @kathia4fitclub

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